A manager's lexicon

Last week, we said, ‘we will get back to you'. Here are some more gems from a modern-day manager's lexicon, and what they actually mean.

 

We need a go-ahead from the top management: You can kiss your request good-bye. The main reason being that the top management is always at least one level above any person, and thus can be made to play the role of a villain.

Expressions such as ‘You know what those guys are like' bear ample testimony to the obstructionist tendencies of this gang of people.

Let's sleep over the matter: A boss' way of telling his subordinate that what one is proposing is a pipe dream. It has nothing whatsoever to do with any guarantee that any further interest will be shown in the matter based through further reflection.

Budgetary constraints: A favourite ploy of negation whenever nothing else seems to dissuade the foolish supplicant. A fearsome tool in the hands of the management that lends itself to all sorts of contortions and interpretations — all of them leading to a ‘no'.

We will discuss this at the next review committee meeting: The name and purpose of the committee is completely irrelevant; the key message is embedded in the dreaded ‘C' word. Once anything is referred to any committee, it disappears into a black hole where it joins all the cosmic debris of the universe.

(To be continued)