“ In 15 years of employment I have never attended any offsite,” said my colleague. “My family just doesn’t allow me, ” she added.

I was bringing together all my colleagues for the first time and I needed a full house. “This is where you get to bond with colleagues better. It will be a different setting, you will get to know colleagues from other locations. You will understand our vision, direction, and it will also be fun,” I persuaded her till she said yes.

However, that day, on my way home, as I reflected on my multiple offsite experiences, I wasn’t sure about my assurance to her.

The dancing prince

As a first-time manager, I was excited about my first offsite at Agra. About 40 of us had gathered at a resort. We loved the visits to all the historic places during the day. In the evening, a cocktail dinner was planned with senior leaders, who had arrived from HQ. Most of the team were experiencing an event like this for the first time and were happy to just down their drinks with some chit-chat. Just then, somebody increased the volume of the music — belting out Bollywood hits.

To our surprise, we saw our boss’s boss, the quietest man until then, breaking out on the dancing floor. Many of us were nervous as we didn’t know if it was ok to dance with senior leaders. Just then our sales head pulled a lady colleague to the floor for a dance.

There were just two women amongst the 40 and it was clear they weren’t comfortable. The lady in question continued to dance with the old drunk pro; every time she retreated to her seat, he would pull her back to the floor. As her supervisor, I helplessly looked at my boss who was looking the other way as the leader in question was his boss. This went on till the DJ ended the music. There were many red faces that night, including mine.

Next morning, breakfast was awkward as I asked my colleague about the previous evening. She said, “if your super boss is sort of forcing me to dance and both my immediate bosses are not intervening, what do you expect me to do?” As a 24-year-old manager, I could only plead helplessness.

I think the dance floor is the most awkward place to be in an offsite. The most innocent looking colleagues in the office hallway turn rogue after a couple of drinks and use dance and music as an excuse to bond.

The usual suspects

All offsites have some usual drills. There is the mandatory speech by the CEO or business head who organises it. Then some external facilitator takes you through team-building activities.

Men like to play cricket and they force everybody to get into the game so that a few of them can show how well they can bat, with novices bowling. The boredom amongst the remaining is palpable but who cares?

Then there is this act of getting into the swimming pool and breaking decorum, all the norms the resort would have set. Here again, there is a wide display of pushing and pulling of colleagues who are uncomfortable with water.

But it is not just your colleagues whom you make uncomfortable but also the other guests who have unfortunately chosen to holiday at the same time in that hotel.

Most employers organise offsites for annual celebrations, new product launches, to mark milestones or for team-building exercises. Depending on the size of the organisation and the context, hundreds of people congregate in luxurious hotels. Almost every guest in the hotel gets to know about it as there is a prominent display of the brand.

Plenty of employees wear their company logo T shirts while they indulge in all the activities at the hotel. So, besides having fun and bonding with colleagues, maybe there is a need for employees to protect the brand image of the company, too, at public venues such as hotels.

But executives are so immersed in their fun that they forget about other guests who are sort of held to ransom by their en masse unruly behaviour across restaurants, pool, gym and other common areas.

I forgot to add the Antakshari fans who only stop singing when other guests in neighbouring rooms complain. Even at 2.00 am, people tend to say, ‘give us another 10 minutes and we will be done.’ Hotels also plead helplessness as they have no control post signing up with their high-value customer.

I have to admit that not all offsites are coloured with bad behaviour. There are still plenty of organisations who conduct offsites with a sense of purpose.

However, there is surprising leniency towards alcohol-induced inappropriate behaviour at these getaways.

Kamal Karanth is co founder Xpheno, a specialist staffing firm

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